My Browsing History…

What better way to get to know a person than to seriously analyze take a look at their browsing history on their PC. I feel free to do this because I do know that there are no porn sites there… otherwise I certainly wouldn’t be opening myself up to such scrutiny!!

They Know!!

Etsy.com – LOVE this site. Most recently I was searching for jewelry trees (I thought this one was quite cool but far too pricey for my current budget, since I’d probably need two) because keeping a bunch of necklaces in a drawer is just dumb. I have now decided to make one like this for myself… branch, cool pot, cement, cool rocks… how hard could it be, right?

PapaJohns.com – Seriously not sure why this comes up second, because it has been at least a week a while since I ordered pizza from there. We like to do a Friday night pizza night… I like a local place better, but PJ’s delivers!

Oh, wait!! I skipped one!!

NicLibraries.org – This was actually first. Being distracted by the wonder that is Etsy, I missed it. This is the online catalog for my library’s consortium. Get out there and read!!!

Facebook, Google, Twitter, Gmail, Mail.Yahoo … No explanation needed, right? Oh, wait… I searched “7 deadly sins” in Google today. Maybe I am not as beyond reproach as I think…

Mercurialnature.com – My dearest friend’s blog. If you don’t already, you gotta read it. She is an excellent writer, amazing insights, hilarious… and the reason that I blog myself!

Bing.com/travel and Expedia.com – Dude, I want to go visit my aforementioned dearest friend this Spring. Why the heck are airfares so dang expensive??

Adobe.com – Seriously, I am so having withdrawals from Photoshop on my laptop!! I had a crappy older version on one of my old desktops but it really isn’t as great as the nice version of the Adobe CS that I have at work (because I am WEBMASTER! Imagine my cape and the W on my chest!) So anyway, I have downloaded a trial version of Photoshop Elements and in 30 days I will be guilting my husband to let me buy it outright considering purchasing it.

Alright, enough of this torture… maybe this wasn’t as interesting as I thought! 😛 And, truthfully, I was picking and choosing. Bwahahahaha!

Another Listicles

Otherwise Entitled: Are you looking at me??

Otherwise Entitled: Ten things that wig me out make me anxious

1. The fact that I got on Twitter when I got home 15 minutes ago and it has changed back and forth in format 5 times since I logged in is making me anxious… WTF? What if I miss important tweets? What if I can’t figure out the new format?? What if my life really is all about Twitter?

2. As I mentioned before, judgmental people make me anxious… or the thought that they are judging me. STOP LOOKING AT ME LIKE THAT!!! :/

3. Taking all three of my kids out by myself makes me anxious. This is a big admission for me, because I’ve never really told anyone. It is better since they are older… but before I used to pass out from the panic really get super uptight if my husband couldn’t come along for a prolonged outing with all three. Stop judging me… :/

4. It is making me anxious (and pissed off) that my dog is sitting here staring at me because I am eating some Cheezits. STOP STARING!

5. I get anxious… I also call it “spinny” when there is too much noise around me. Not one noise (like a concert, for example), but a lot of different noises that are competing for my attention.

6. I get anxious about what kind of life my children will have. I want them to grow up with every possible opportunity… and I hope I am not screwing them up too much and dooming them to tons of money spent in therapy.

7. Ok, I’ll admit it… geese make me anxious. I disguise it as dislike, but I am freaking scared of the damn things. We had geese as pets when I was a kid (thanks for the scarring, mom!) and ever since they have really bugged me. And you know, I think that the V formation that they fly in stands for Victory! (over us! I swear!) The geese REALLY need to stop looking at me!

8. This is one of the most horrible truths in my life: Coffee makes me anxious!!! I have this limit… not a limit I can measure in amount of coffee, but one I can feel in my brain. It is like CLICK, I’ve had too much coffee and suddenly everyone is out to get me and my kids are too loud and my husband is freaking annoying… and they are all looking at me! This is really unfair… I love coffee and coffee hates me! 😦

9. Entertaining makes me VERY anxious. I hardly invite people over because I don’t have enough anti-anxiety medication I never end up enjoying it, at all!

10. I am feeling anxious that you are reading this and thinking either 1) she didn’t take this very seriously or 3) dang, she is a whack job…. Please don’t look at me in that tone of thought… :-/

Thanks to Ally from Two Normal Moms for this week’s topic. There was a choice of two topics, actually, but I chose this one to help Ally feel a little better about having a few neuroses. Heck, this only scratches the surface for me!!

The Hypocrite List

Otherwise entititled:  10 things I said I’d never do

Otherwise entitled: Famous Last Words

Otherwise entitled: I know it isn’t Monday… shut up

And now: list of ten, never say never edition… topic  by Not Enough Patience and Never Enough Jewelry

Make a list, check it twice, link it up. Read others. Have fun!

1. I was only going to have two children… I now have three. But really, there will be no more. The oven has been removed.

2. I was NEVER going to have a cell phone for more than emergencies… yeah, my smartphone is attached to my hip.

3. Along the same vein, I was NEVER going to text in the middle of a conversation with someone IRL…. erm, yeah… sometimes it is important, dammit!

4. I would NEVER get a tattoo. I now have two. And thinking seriously about what to do for number three.

5. I would NEVER get an eReader, not going to move away from real books… yup, got a Nook in November. I am not giving up on books completely, tho. Really, I’m not!

6. I complained for a month about the ugly purple ornaments on our work Christmas trees, cuz purple is NOT a Christmas color (they were only purple)… and then I wore a purple sweater to our Christmas potluck lunch. (this is more of a hypocritical moment, but I thought it fit nicely)

7. I said I was NEVER going to get into Twitter… yeah, I have over 7000 tweets.

8.  I was NEVER going to cuss in front of my kids. Did I tell you about the time that I had to meet with the principal because my Kindergartener had shouted “shit” in the hallway outside her office? Yeah, I told her that it was very likely that it was my fault.

9. I was going to have a really clean house… or, I guess I should say I was NEVER going to have a messy house. But guys, priorities! And seriously, don’t judge me… cuz I hate judgmental people

10. I really think I once said that I was NEVER going to have a blog… no, really, I am not just putting that here to finish my list. REALLY!

Sunday Stealing…

Time to join in on this one, I think.

Sunday Stealing: The Never Ending Meme, Part Two

Cheers to all of us thieves!

21. Did you go to your high school prom?

I did. With a guy that I thought I had a crush on but realized by the date of the dance that I didn’t. He, on the other hand, apparently developed a large crush on me between the time that I asked him and the date of the dance. Awwwkkkwwwaaaarrrdddd!

22. Perfect time to wake up?

About 9 AM… or maybe 8 AM, but then stay in bed goofing off for an hour or so. This only happens on weekends.

23. Perfect time to go to bed?

Between 11 PM and midnight, if the next day will be like the answer above.

24. Do you use your queen right away in chess?

Never played more than a game or two, so I can’t say.

25. Ever been in a car accident?

Yes, but only minor fender benders.

26. Closer to mom or dad…or neither?

Mom.

27. What age is this exciting life over for you?

Life will always be exciting as long as I am here!

28. What decade during the 20th century would you have chosen to be a teenager?

Probably the one that I was in, the 80’s. Can’t really imagine anything else.

29. Favorite shoes you have EVER owned?

I have to pick just one?? Probably the Dansko mules that my mom bought for me (I could never afford them) Most comfortable shoes in the world!

30. Do you have an article of clothing you have had since you were in high school?

A few, actually. I was wearing a jacket from high school until this last spring when I finally replaced it. Have some sweatshirts from that era, too.

31. Were you in track and field?

Nope. I was a brain, not a jock! LOL

32. Were you ever in a school talent show?

No, although I played Snow White in the school play in 4th grade

33. Have you ever written in a library book?

WHAT??? You ask this of a librarian?? Defacement of library property is an actual crime… did you know that???

34. Allergic to?

Barking dogs, whining kids, whining husbands…. you get the idea

35. Favorite fruit?

Apples. I must say here that peaches are disgusting and the smell of them makes me gag…

Self Fulfilling Prophecies

You know how something changes in your life and you get your mind wrapped up in what *might* happen with this change? And the change might be something that makes you feel like a total lunatic, ready for the asylum is unexpected and not completely understood? All of the Google’ing (it is spelled that way because I said so) in the world can’t quite make you feel comfortable with this change?

Yeah, that was me yesterday. I had my head so wrapped around what could happen with this new med and the reasons that it is often prescribed that I made myself (more) nuts. And as the day goes on it gets worse, because all of these mental gymnastics are exhausting! So sometimes at the end of the day you need to shut the brain (and the cell phone) off… and try to quiet it all down. And it is better… a new day brings sunshine again. Mantra for the day: I can only control what happens *right now*

Love to the dear friends who I freaked out last night… and to the hubs who knew to just leave me alone. He is learning!

Friday Fragments

From Half-Past Kissin’ Time – Friday Fragments are bits and pieces of your week that are usually brief; too short for a stand-alone post, but too good to discard.

Ginger’s Fragments:

I need to find a new mascara. All three of the Avon mascaras that I have tried (including the one that is supposed to be really hard to remove) leave me with raccoon eyes by noon. Not pretty!

Some things should not be done after taking my sleeping meds. Actually, make that MOST things!

Just when I get myself *two* new winter coats (great sales), the weather turns abnormally warm. 47 degrees at noon in January! Crazy!

I need to listen to my dearest friend when she tells me what to do. And, well, she really should listen to me too! LOL

There are levels of crazy. Sometimes it is nice to realize that maybe you are on a lower level…

Ok, that’s probably enough <winky>

Now follow the linky…

 

 

Sage and Tarot Cards

Yesterday was a rough day. I try not to keep score… but the rough ones seem to have been increasing lately. Sigh… have an appointment to see the doc about my meds on Monday, so we’ll see what happens there.

Last night, though, I got home from work and decided that I wasn’t going to sit down and dwell on my bad day. I decided to try to turn it around instead. As I do sometimes when I need to refocus or decompress, I went to my sacred space. As I’ve mentioned before, I have gotten into some alternative spirituality and find a lot of fulfillment in certain rituals. So last night I lit a smudge stick (dried herbs, mostly sage) to cleanse my energy. I also lit a couple of candles… “magick” candles made with the intention for affecting certain energies. Last night I used a Clearing and a Healing candle. I lit my smudge stick so that it would smoke fairly heavily… and then meditated as I breathed in the clearing energy and breathed out the negative. It took some time, but I did begin to feel release. It made a good effort at bringing me back from the unhappy place.

As I finished meditating, I was drawn to my deck of tarot cards. I use the tarot as another way to channel the energy around me. So I gathered the deck and held it in the smudge smoke for a few moments to clear its energy. I then began to mix the deck, without any specific purpose but to find some clarity… and almost immediately three cards fell out of the deck and onto the floor. I could take this as a clumsy error and just pick them up, but I feel that things like this aren’t mistakes… those cards were meant to appear at that moment. The cards that fell were:

The Tower, Ten of Wands & Ten of Cups

Ok, so what does it mean, you ask… first of all, I kept the three in the order in which they fell… The Tower was on top, when I turned them face up. Although there are many facets to reading the cards, the simplest designation is that the left card represents the past, the center card represents the present, and the right card represents the future. So, in this case:

The Past  The Tower: Something that has been created without a solid foundation is collapsing. Often ideas created out of illusion or false beliefs will come to an end. The card signifies a sudden or unexpected ending.

This card appeared to me once before, as a future card, right before a relationship abruptly ended. I take its appearance now to show that that ending is now behind me.

The Present Ten of Wands: The man carries a heavy load but keeps his eyes forward. Although he is overwhelmed and weary of his responsibilities, he is determined to look beyond to the promise of the future.

For me? Um, yeah, I’ve been overwhelmed. This card is telling me to not give up.

The Future Ten of Cups: I’ll let my handbook speak for this one “When the Ten of Cups shows up in a reading, it represents happiness in one’s home life, together with the promise of lasting success in a relationship. It symbolizes committed and contented love with permanence.”

A lot of my stress centers around my home life. That is just the way it is. The appearance of this card gives me assurance that when I look beyond my current overwhelmed state, happiness is there. The card does not tell me exactly how this will come to me, but it gives me reassurance that it is coming.

—————

In the end, after my smudging and my reading of the cards, my heart felt lighter and open for possibilities… tomorrow is a new day and I need to look ahead to the happiness that is coming.

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