The grass is greener…

How much do we live our lives wanting something that we don’t have? Looking at something that someone else has and wishing for it as our own? Creating a dream that MUST be better than what we are living? I think we all do it, some more than others. Recently, in reading a wonderful blog (I can’t find the specific link at the moment..) I came across this amazing statement:

“The grass is greener where you water it. So water this moment with your love and appreciation.”

I am so guilty of wishing for something different than what I have. Yes, I had an affair recently. Yes, I thought that this other person was everything that I didn’t have and that I needed in my life. It was my ultimate “grass is greener” moment. The recovery from that situation and its aftermath has been a difficult road. I have faced some painful truths. I have reevaluated almost every part of my life. And yet, through all of that pain, I have emerged with a growing inner strength that I never had before. A wise woman has told me that all things in life, even if they are painful, give us gifts. I have definitely emerged with gifts after this experience.

So, back to watering my grass… I was in the shower the other day, mulling over things as I often do in the shower, and my former other man came to mind and started buzzing around again. And I stopped and thought “What was it that you wanted out of that, really?” The answer? I wanted someone to have that fairy tale with… a love that would overcome all obstacles (that relationship definitely had obstacles) and a man who would do anything to be with me. You know what?? When I really think about it, I already do have that! I have an amazing man (my husband) who would and has done anything to be with me. And our love has overcome huge obstacles… including this affair mess. I am so blessed to have this love and I now know that I need to nurture the grass that I already have… because it really is quite beautiful!

So much truth…

Judgmental people

I hate judgmental people. First of all, my business is my business. Well, no, the compulsive over-sharing thing kinda negates that, doesn’t it? But I don’t put my business out there to be judged, ok? I mean, I’m not judging you for being on Twitter all day and having no life, or for wearing that cat sweater, or for your dumb haircut. Uummm… ok, maybe I am a teeny bit judgmental. I guess it is when people are outwardly judgmental. Like you know when you can just tell by the look on their face? Or by the tone of a comment that they make on Facebook or a response to a tweet? You KNOW you can tell the tone, right?

Ok, maybe I hate people who make me feel like they are being judgmental… you know, because they have that look on their face, or they have that tone! Because then you have to feel like you have to filter yourself around them… you can’t just be you! And, if you aren’t getting the idea yet, I really have a hard time with my filter. Basically it is broken. So then I feel like people are being judgmental about my lack of filter… and I can’t help it!!

Alright, maybe I hate people who make me paranoid… no, really, some people just have it out for me. There is reason to be paranoid! Really!

Alright, the point is, don’t judge me or I will have to have to have a smackdown…

Male cat doesn’t like judgment from furball dog, either

Blogging – therapy for the over-sharer?

I have come to realize recently that I am, in fact, a compulsive over-sharer. Spilling all of the stuff that happens in my life, good and bad, seems to just come as some sort of instinct. And I’ve got those good friends that are always interested in hearing it and friends that listen and maybe just pretend at times to be interested… and then there are those people that I kinda know and I really shouldn’t be sharing certain stuff with. But you know what? Sometimes I do it anyway! And I don’t even think anything of it before I’ve totally proven that I am insane it is too late. Keep in mind, most of this is online sharing… yeah, I am one of those people with a big online group of friends. So I have these instances where I go too far and I imagine people running from their computer screaming and putting my pic out as “beware of this lunatic”. Yeah, I don’t really blame them.

But here’s the thing… this is me. Part of who I am is someone who lets it all hang out. I was out shopping today, enjoying all of the knicky knacks in the stationary store (you know, the one with the Christmas ornaments?) and I came across a wall hanging with the wonderful Dr Seuss quote on it –

“Be who you are and say what you feel because those who mind don’t matter and those who matter don’t mind.”

So there it is… I am me and I’m going to share. And so I’ve decided to use this blog as my outlet for the need to share beyond the people who actually want to hear about it. And those of you reading this will be my captives willing readers because you chose to navigate here! Aren’t you lucky??

So let me thank you, in advance, for indulging this compulsion of mine. I hope you find something useful in all of these ramblings.